Tomato
by Itanohira
Summary: Lovino, on his birthday, wishes on a star - and the next morning, his tomato plant is gone and 'stolen' by some Spaniard he finds passed out and naked on his balcony!  /Spamano, USUK
1. Enter Lovino, and Antonio the Tomato!

Woooo! Multi-chaptered fic! Speaking of multi-chaptered, I just finished 'Love you Too' asfjefeiovjvnafwaerioef - I'm so sorryyyyyyyyyyyyyy it took so long! ;;;;w;;;; And also, I really wanted to make something lighthearted and (hopefull) funny after writing that piece.

JUST TO LET YOU KNOW, LOVINO LIVES BY HIMSELF IN ANOTHER TOWN FAR AWAY FROM HIS HOMETOWN WHERE HIS YOUNGER BROTHER LIVES, SO FELI DOESN'T VISIT TOO OFTEN. (I just needed an excuse for Lovino to be alone ;a;)

**VERY IMPORTANT!: More thanks to Justkissmeidiot, I'm so thankful you read over the idea and gave me help! Haha, I'd get nothing done without youuuuuuuu! :'DDD**

Oh, and also, this will be a romance story, so don't worry!

****EDIT: **Near the end of the story, I made a very grave, unforgivable mistake. ...I had typed 'you're' when the correct grammar would to be to say 'your' aghhhhhh that's my biggest pet peeve... U_U;;;

**.**

**Tomato**

.

_If I could only have one wish..._

It was his birthday again, as he sat all on his lonesome in his apartment.

His head hit the table with a resolute thud, and he gave a spare glance to the side at the clock adorning the wall, and frowned when it read ten til nine. He groaned and let his head slide back down when he realized he forgot to water Antonio. The Italian stayed like that for a few minutes, as he contemplated not getting up at all, but in the end his care for his plant won, and the Italian sluggishly got up to find a cup to fill with water. He looked around lazily, and finally found a glass in the cheap cupboard. He grabbed it and turned to the sink, immediately turning the tap.

_Antonio._ When he had first gotten him (he always got strange looks when referring to his plant as a him, but he tried to ignore them), he had detested the small, pathetic excuse for a tomato plant; it was shriveled and wilted, no doubt the work of Feliciano. His brother loved plants, but could never grow them - they had all ended up dead. Lovino himself didn't have much of a green thumb either, yet this barely alive plant he had _tried_ to take care of seemed to not only live, it had grown larger and healthier than any plant he had ever seen, to his amazement.

His rather large tomato plant living on his small balcony was given to him by his younger brother years ago on their shared birthday. Though Lovino always thought about how idiotic it was to not only take care of a plant like an actual person, much less give it a name, he never could quite stop caring for him. Call it loneliness, or whatever regular people would blame it on, he felt as if the tomato plant in his apartment was his only real friend, aside from his brother.

Even if he got a lack of response from the plant while Lovino ranted about his day, or the people in it. Though, sometimes, if Lovino was looking extra carefully at his plant, he could see the leaves slightly tremble, as if his plant was laughing. But that was impossible - plants couldn't laugh, and they probably couldn't hear either.

In the beginning, he had forgotten to water Antonio, and also forgot to bring him inside when the weather got too cold - he even dropped him a few times while taking his inside. At first, he couldn't get himself to really care. Then, the plant began to grow greener, began to stand up a little straighter. It took Lovino months to realize that it still wasn't dead yet. He remembers Feliciano's visit quite clearly, he had visited him a little less than a year after gifting the tomato plant, and had commented on how green and not-dead it had become. Lovino had taken another look at it and it was true - the plant _had_ become much healthier. If his brother hadn't been there, a warm smile would have wormed itself onto his face.

The shocking cold of water overfilling the cup jolted him out of his thoughts. He hastily turned the tap off, and put the glass down onto the counter, wiping his hands off on the rag hanging from the sink's cabinet. Grabbing the cup, Lovino strided out the balcony door with ease, smoothly walking out into the warm night air, the cool glass perspiring in his hand. He kneeled down in front of Antonio and pet one of the larger lower leaves as he slowly began to drizzle the water into the pot. "Hey there, tomato bastard..." He smiled softly as he finished dumping the rest of the liquid and sat beside the plant. "It's nice tonight, isn't it?"

He looked up at the clear night, hundreds of thousands of small pinpricks of light scattered against the inky blue-black sky. A small part of him liked to think Antonio was able to see the same sky he was seeing, and snorted as soon as the thought passed.

He let his hand keep a loose grip on the edge of the terracotta pot, continuing to look up. After a while, the loneliness he had been feeling earlier had began to creep up to him again. He let the back of his free hand rest against his forehead.

-x-

It was almost midnight already, which meant that his birthday was going to end soon. Not that it was much of a birthday, anyways. He sighed, and leaned more against Antonio's pot. Looking up again, his eyes slightly widened when a bright light flashed against the sky. He felt a smile grace his lips as he witnessed the shooting star and unintentionally gripped the pot's edge, as one thought subtly flit across his mind, barely registering the thought.

_I don't want to be alone anymore._

The star disappeared as quickly as it came, and Lovino couldn't help but rebuke himself about the wish he made. Wishes didn't come true just by wishing on a star, and people didn't become easily become friends with someone with Lovino's temperament.

He let go of the pot slowly, standing up and stretching, hearing the soft pops resulting from it. He bent down to grab the glass he had set on the ground earlier, and turned away to go back inside.

"Happy Birthday, Lovino..." he murmured.

If he gave a backwards glance to Antonio, he would of seen the plant ever so slightly slightly droop.

-x-

He had a long, dreamless sleep that night, and woke up when the sun's rays wouldn't relent as it shone through the window. He stood up and stretched, remnants of last night's disappointing birthday coming back to him in slow flashes.

He slid off the bed, scratching the back of his head as he walked out into the kitchen. He brewed himself a pot of coffee, yawning. The old coffee machine seemed to be struggling with just warming up, so Lovino decided to walk out to water Antonio again.

He stepped out backwards, and turned around to see how he was do-

Lovino shrieked when a very tan, very naked man was sprawled where Antonio had been the night before.

"AIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" The Italian screamed when the man twitched. Lovino scrambled backwards into his apartment, ducking behind the sliding glass door, warily peeking his face out. He watched the man let out a content sigh, and turned, letting Lovino have a very nice view of the man's tan backside. Panic rushed through Lovino's body as thoughts rapidly flashed in his head.

_Who is he? How'd he get up here? Why is he naked?_

The most prevalent and most alarming thought being, _W-where is Antonio?_

Looking away and shuffling back inside, Lovino grabbed the closest heavy object he could carry - his very old, very worn toaster. It had served him faithfully ever since he bought it at the store years ago - it will finally serve it's most likely final deed for him today. Holding his weapon of choice against his chest tightly, he quietly tip-toed to his balcony door, looking around to scope it out once more, silently hoping the man had woken up and somehow had gotten off the platform.

No such luck. Lovino quivered.

He breathed in deeply, still shaking slightly as he snuck up on the sleeping intruder. He lifted the toaster above his head, ready to throw it against the other's cranium, when the man suddenly snorted, and sat up, blinking sleepily.

"L-Lovi-?" Lovino, in response to the man's sudden awakening, switched into full blown out panic mode, screeched, and slammed the dull red kitchen appliance against the Spaniard's forehead. The man fell back, Lovino pulling the toaster back against his chest.

_Crapcrapcrapcrap-_

He looked around to see if anyone saw what had happened, and laid the toaster shakily onto the cement floor. Lovino hooked his arms under the intruder's arms and sloppily dumped him onto the worn grey couch sagging in the living room. He hovered around the tan man nervously before laying his head against the man's chest, searching for a heartbeat. It steadily pumped against his ear, the lulling beat causing him to close his eyes. Realizing what he was doing, his face flushed bright red as he stumbled backwards clumsily, landing on his bottom. The Italian bit his lip to stifle his cry.

He kept an eye on the naked man as he walked out of the living room in search of something to cover him with. After searching fruitlessly for some time trying to find a large shirt, he grabbed a towel and quickly deposited it onto the Spaniard.

Frowning, he picked up the phone to call the only person he knew who wasn't fazed by his rough personality: Alfred, the ice-cream man who lived in the downtown district of town.

"Ah - hey there, welcome to Alfred's Super Icecream shop! Would you like large, super-sized, or HERO size-"

"Bastard, it's me." Lovino growled, taking a quick peek back on the intruder. "Listen, I need help-"

"I'm not paying for your rent again, dude-" Alfred laughed, cutting the Italian off.

"No, no! I don't need help with the damn rent!" He shout-whispered and took another look behind him, before turning back around. "I found some guy on my balcony, and I think he took Antonio-"

"Your potato? Dude, that _sucks_! Good thing you caught him! Artie might of been next!"

"Gahhh he's not a goddamn _potato_ - and be quiet for once you American! I need you here to help me!" He took another cautious look behind him. Good, he wasn't on the couch. "That guy could wake up any minute now and attack me! Come, before he wakes up so we can interrogate him-"

He wasn't on the couch.

_crapcrapcrapcrapshittttttttt-_

"..."

"Lovino?"

"ALFRED SAVE ME DUMBASSSSSSSSS!"

_...It would be to not be so lonely anymore._

* * *

><p>gigglesnortsnort<p>

haha, new story! Hmmmm, the pairings I'm putting in for sure for right now are: Spamano, and USUK

songs:

Call me - Blondie

【オリジナルPV】ハッピーシンセサイザ 歌ってみた。

Oh gawd I was laughing the whole time I wrote this pffffttttttttttt-


	2. Enter Antonio the Human? Edit

Hello there again! How have you guys been liking the story so far? I'm thoroughly enjoying myself~ ...Romano/Lovino crying is so cute, haha...ha~

and...this chapter did not go the way I wanted it to...ergh...

Still, I hope you can still sorta enjoy this!

...

One question...

What do you think the standard for how much Lovino/Romano curses is? A lot? A whole lot? Almost never (pfffft. Yeah right.)?

**Edit: 2/28/12, fixed some grammar and made it flow easier, added in more stuff to make it less rushed. Sorry for the troll chapter... ;a;**

* * *

><p><strong>.<strong>

**Tomato**

**.**

Lovino tightened his hold on the small plastic portable device, his heart fluttering painfully against his rib cage.

"H-he's not on the couch anymore!" Lovino whispered into the phone. No response. He winced as he heard the sharp clattering of Alfred's phone falling and muffled footsteps over a vague sounding '_Don't worry, the HERO is coming, little Italian dude!' _over the phone, along with a sharp, '_Watch it, git!'_. Lovino put the phone down shakily, looking around as to not get surprise attacked by the tan man. He got up, stumbling around his apartment, and though the small flat was bathed in cheery morning sunlight, it had an eerily quiet demeanor that couldn't help but make him feel like he was a sub character in a bad horror movie.

Lovino let out a shaky breath. The sub characters _always_ died. No questions asked.

That really wasn't helping with Lovino's already low supply of courage. He tried to shake off the feeling as well as he could, and stalked into the kitchen, quickly grabbing a small knife, and skittered out into the empty living room.

It was now or never. Kill or be killed. _Or worse,_ Lovino thought as he stepped into the hallway, each soft footstep suddenly sounding like an elephant's stomping to his ears, and the Italian was struck by the irrational fear that the intruder would be able to hear the erratic beating of his heart. He cautiously pressed on, leaning heavily against the wall, peeking over every door frame for a sign of the intruder. He still hadn't encountered the Spaniard, though he _had_ jumped in one room, screaming and waving his knife frantically at a lamp he had _thought_ was the man.

When it came down to it, Lovino concluded that he didn't work well under pressure.

Still, the little Italian swallowed and despite his instincts telling him to _get the hell out of there_, he didn't. Though, with all of the screaming he had done earlier, he was sure the plant thief had heard him coming. He looked into the second to last room - his bathroom - only to find it empty. That meant there was only one more room to search...

...his bedroom.

He could feel adrenaline rush through his body dizzily as he gripped the small knife in a vice grip, his steps beginning to get shorter in distance. His bedroom door was ajar, and Lovino stopped before the frame, planning his battle plan. _Run in, scream, and attack. Run in, scream, and attack. Run in -_

"Lovi?" A slightly accented voice called out. Lovino, frozen with fear, looked up, locking eyes with the man in front of him. No one said anything, until the Spaniard took a hasty step forward.

"L-Lovi! I've always wanted to see you - you're so cute - and I never thought I'd ever - though it kinda hurt when you - and - and -" The Latin man rambled embarrassedly, his sentences mashing together until Lovino couldn't understand a word of what he was saying. He forgot about the reason why he was there with a knife in his hand, and continued to stare at the Spaniard, shocked. The Spaniard seemed to sense the atmosphere and finished with an uncertain,"...It's me, Antonio?" His voice tilted to a higher tone near the end, making his intended statement sound more like a question.

"..." The silence that concluded the Spaniard's rambles was deafening. At least, enough to snap Lovino out of his slight stupor.

"S-so you're..." Lovino took a step back, his hand dropping the kitchen utensil. Antonio flinched at the clattering noise it made."...a stalker?"

"W-what?"

"S...stalker!" Lovino screeched, running away from the Spanish man, all pretenses of his courage, dropped. Antonio ran after the Italian, latching a hand onto the other's thin wrist.

"Wait!" Antonio called out as he took a step forward, bewildered. "It's me, Anto-!"

"Let go!" Lovino let his hand fly out, trying to hit Antonio's face. Antonio staggered back, dodging the Italian's hit, but didn't let go of the Italian, who, in the taller man's stumbling, was pressed against his toned chest. Blushing furiously, he struggled, pushing and yelling as he tried to get away from the Spaniard. Antonio, still naked, was struggling to keep the smaller Italian from hurting him or himself accidentally in the middle of the hall, and during the process, the pair bumped into the wall and the small side table. The Spaniard vaguely hoped Lovino hadn't gotten bruised by hitting it.

"Please, Lovi!" Antonio cried out. "I don't want you to hurt yourself! Or me!" He grabbed the Italian by his waist, squeezing as he tried to keep Lovino still. It proved seconds later ineffective in trying to calm the other.

Fear began to bubble up Lovino's throat as his 'stalker' began to grope his waist. He continued to squirm violently, and it only seemed to make the taller man squeeze harder, if anything. Lovino was then faced with two descisions: let this man have his way with him, or try and get out, no matter how degrading it would be. Gathering his already shattered courage, Lovino closed his eyes and bit the inside of his cheek before letting out a soft cry, and inwardly winced when the tone of it reminded him of his younger brother.

"S-stop! No!" The intruder still didn't seem to letting go anytime soon, and Lovino stopped struggling all together, switching tactics and deciding to let crocodile tears collect on the corners of his eyes and slide down his face instead. "Le...let go...!"

"A-ah! Lovi! Don't cry!" Antonio let go of Lovino, opting for another way to calm down the frantic Italian. As soon as his arms fell off his waist, Lovino slumped onto his knees limply, feigning fear, and quieted down almost immediately, catching the Spaniard off guard. "...Lovi?"

"..." the Italian mumbled brokenly, looking down and Antonio leaned in closer. Lovino, on cue, shifted away pathetically, feeling as if he had the upper hand as he mentally patted himself on the back for what he thought was _amazing_ acting skills.

"What?"

"I said..." Lovino looked up, his bangs covering one golden eye, fiercely glaring at the Spaniard with a single amber orb, dropping his facade immediately. "Get OUT!" He yelled as he jumped up, his head hitting the underside of Antonio's jaw with his signature move. Antonio didn't stand a chance.

One for Lovino, zip for the intruder-bastard.

Rubbing his now sore forehead and wiping off leftover tears, Lovino went off to find something long and flexible, to tie up the again unconscious man in his hallway. Before he left and turned his back, he turned back around and decided to drag the Spaniard with him. After all, it wouldn't do any good to have that little scenario happening again. He propped the tanned man against his plain white wall, walking backwards so he could keep an eye on him as he backed against his twin sized bed, grimacing as he pulled the thin covers off.

This. Bastard.

Lovino inwardly mourned for his cheap sheets as he wrapped them around the still naked Antonio, the attempt to tie him up questionably effective. He knotted the cloth once more, feeling much safer than he did moments ago.

He turned, not aware of the end of the cloth that had wrapped around his ankle. He took a step, and screamed when he fell over, his chin painfully hitting the floor. "...should've put in a damn carpet..." He growled, trying to soothe his throbbing chin. Lovino didn't notice that his trip had unknowingly undid the knot he had oh-so-carefully made, and continued on out his bedroom.

Antonio, who was startled conscious by the Italian's scream ('So, so, cute~' he inwardly gushed), clumsily untangled himself from the sheets and followed Lovino into the living room. He stopped when Lovino stopped, wisely keeping his mouth shut. The Italian sighed, letting the heel of his palm press against his eyes.

"Antonio..." He still needed to find his precious friend who had gone missing...Lovino didn't know what he would do without the tomato plant.

Antonio couldn't help himself; when the small Italian had said his name so softly, he had instinctively jumped, wrapping his arms around him, with both of them toppling over haphazardly.

"Wh-WHAT-?"

-x-

"Don't worry, Lovino! The HERO is here!" Alfred shouted as he kicked the door open with surprising strength, despite it being locked. "I'll go get that plant thief!"

He did a quick pose before running off into a room where a telltale scream resounded from, and ran in it's direction.

"Still alive..." He stumbled into what seemed to be the living room. "...Italian...dude?"

He pushed his glasses up as he looked onto the scene before him with interest and lifted a blond eyebrow.

Lovino, who was knocked out, was pressed tightly against who Alfred supposed was the intruder-slash-potato(tomato?) stealer, smiling as if he won a free year supply of McDonald's (or, in the Spaniard's case, an Italian) and was enjoying it intensely.

_Guess Lovino really didn't need any help after all..._

-x-

"Uh..." Alfred shifted his weight to the side, getting the man's attention. The Spaniard immediately took on a defensive position, his form stiffening as he pulled Lovino from his front to his side. "...guess you're -Thief?" Antonio stayed silent, although a confused expression pushed itself onto his face. Alfred stayed standing, not taking a step back or forward. When he did take a small step forward, Antonio visibly tensed.

Alfred put on his thinking face on and began to weigh his options. Save his friend, or go back home where a certain _rose_ was waiting for him. Hmm. The American began to ponder his choices. It was quite a hard pick. Either way, he'd have a very pissy male to apologize (maybe even more...) to. He slipped back into his grin, and stuffed his hands into his pockets.

He took a step back, watching the naked (which was pretty cool. Maybe he'd try it out too, Alfred thought.) man watch him. "...Just tell the little Italian that I didn't break down the door. And, uh, that I _did_ come on time, just at the _wrong_ time. Yeah."

Alfred would always be a hero. Afterall, it would take someone very, very brave to put up with an angry, ranting Lovino when the Italian would predictably wake later, confused and dazed. Yes, only a hero would be able to do such a feat. He gave Antonio a quick salute and grinned as he bounded out the doorless door frame.

"Hahahaha! The HERO has saved the day, again!"

* * *

><p>Awww, poor baby. Lovino really believed Antonio was groping him when Antonio was just trying to steady them. Just saying. Just in case, you know, some of you thought Antonio was really groping him, heheheh. XDD<p>

And you gotta love that crazy American! I certainly do!

Mmmmmm...oh, Kazentaicell =u=, your voice is so...heavenly...~~~~~


End file.
